Ronald McDonald Arrested for Indecent Exposure
The well-known burger spokesman was taken into custody in a city park in Cleveland yesterday after repeatedly urinating in public view. Park officials said the red-and-yellow clad clown lowered his trousers and invited onlookers to "visit the golden arches". McDonald is being held on charges of public indecency, and an unnamed source at the District Attorney's office has suggested that the clown may also face prosecution related to the McDonald's "I'm Loving It" campaign. Further details as they become available.
What has Rock n' Roll done for my love life? Hmmm. Well, hush your mouth! Who do you love, dearest darling? Just say m.a.n., and then bring it to Jerome. Which is all to say, Heyyy, Bo Diddley - you're a roadrunner, baby, and certainly livened up my early courtship years with the delectable Mr. CitrusMoon. We used to drink way too many Cuba Libres and dance the summer afternoon away on our New Orleans balcony to the tunes of "the man himself", "the originator", Ellas McDaniel - "so cool, he's permafrost". Here's to you, Bo!
You can observe Rock and Roll Day by visiting this great gallery of Fillmore posters - 10 groovy pages! And here's a sort of funkalicious pattern to toss into the celebration. I have more new patterns, and some more tab stuff for you, and even more goodies, but no time to do anything with them today. I'll try for tomorrow.
Today's blogliner wonders "If you could choose a dish or drink to be named after you, what would it be, and why?". Well, this one is easy - I would definitely be a TazApple, or Toffee Apple. It's sweet on the outside and tart on the inside, fun and festive, simple yet complex, wholesome, but intriguing. Totally me. Plus it's served on a stick, and everybody knows that food on a stick is better. Recipe here. Please note that I am not one of those slutty Candy Apples, also sometimes (mistakenly) called toffee apples - those are all, like "look at me - I'm so red and shiny", but they are really just hard and superficial - vapid, sugary, useless narcissists. And do you really want to wake up to one the next morning before she gets her red dye #2 on?
In other news, I stayed up all night, literally, updating the LinkBlog; I added about 70 or 80 entries, all from past Citrus Moon posts, though I still have about five more months to catch up on. I am not posting all links, but concentrating (for the most part) on the design, development, and pattern related sites I've come across. If anyone has any good related links, please send them on!
Today's Blogliner asks, "Have you ever received a gift that you absolutely hated?" . Well... not that I hated it, but I just have to comment on my last gift from my husband, who came back from an out-of-town shoot (he's a "sound man") bearing gifts. But he's Greek, and you know what they say about Greeks and gifts, don't you? Anyway, he proudly presented me with, and I quote, "A Head of Cheese" (since this village where they were shooting is famous for its cheese. Plus I think the mayor gave these out to all the crew members as a goodwill gesture, so it was a pretty easy gift...).
The loveliest thing about this offering is really just his use of the precise term "A Head of Cheese", which as far as I know is a perfectly respectable, but incredibly archaic term for "a block of cheese" (I'll have to ask Languagehat about this). So, how does he come up with these phrases? That's what I want to know. Was he an 18th Century English burgher in another life? Anyway, this Blogliner inspiration not only gives me the opportunity to embarrass my husband (and isn't that what love is all about?), it also gives me the chance to present you with this actually quite wonderful memorial "head of cheese" pattern. Please enjoy it every bit as much as I have.
Well. before we go any futher, there are a few things you should know about me. Firstly, I'm great at giving gifts, and as a result, it so happens that I have an entire city named after me - and not just any city - but the freaking cradle of western civilization. Which, of course, is as it should be. I had my eye on that little town for a long time, but then my stupid uncle (such a copycat) decides he wants to be the patron of the city's people, so he tried to bribe them by creating a great a spring of water; but of course, he's an idiot, so he makes it saltwater, which is his favorite thing, but what were those poor mortals supposed to do with that? I, on the other hand, gave them the gift that keeps on giving - the olive tree! With this one little twig that I planted in their midst, they received food, oil, wood, and shade. Plus, it's pretty. So here's one just for you. I've made these in the colors that those nice people, my adoring fans, were famous for using to create art that celebrated my wisdom and glory.
The other thing you should know is that it's just dumb to turn down my gifts. Remember that guy, Paris? I offered him wisdom and victory, but nooooo, he wants some hot model-type chick instead. So what happens? Ten years of war, everyone dying and starving - what a mess. And of course he ends up dead as a doornail. I had to laugh. So the moral of this story is you should just let me do the thinking for both of us, because I've been at this for a long time, and I'm really good at it. Take what I give you and you might just spawn a great civilization. Turn it down, and you'll probably end up with an arrow in your chest and your girlfriend gallavanting off with some other guy. Just a word to the wise.
So. In case you haven't figured it out already (and if not, what do I have to do? hit you over the head?), today I am speaking to you as Athena, also known as "Minerva", the Goddess of Wisdom and Victory, as well as Crafts, and many more things. And yes, this is a plug for today's Blogliner. I sort of figured I was best suited to be Athena, but then I took the Quizzilla's Which of the Greek Gods are You? and Paleothea's Which Greek Goddess are You?, and they both came up "Athena". Fun.
Okay. Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! But here's my excuse: Blogliners, a new project I've been putting together along with Anne and Daisy. Blogliners is meant to provide a possible kickstart of inspiration for bloggers who are feeling a bit blank and casting about for a post topic. We'll be updating it every day, and though (of course) there's only the one entry so far, we have some fun things planned, so after a while, Blogliners should constitute a pretty nice archive of (hopefully) zingy posting ideas.
As for today's bit of inspiration, well, I'll just say that I'm "bonny, blithe, good and gay." Bonny? Okay, sure. Not as bonny as I was 15 pounds and 15 years ago, but, as old ladies go, I'm pretty darn bonny. Blithe? Look: in the dictionary? Under "blithe"? It says "taz". Good? Gee. How to answer this? I'm pretty good, I guess, for a spoiled, self-indulgent, willful type. (Could that possibly translate to "not good"? Nah.) Which leaves us with "gay". Let's just say I'm a very happy sort, and I've spent a whole lot of time, in the past, in a whole lot of gay and gayish bars (*waves* "Hello, Big Easy; where y'at?!"), but nevertheless, I'm pretty straight. So really, I'm just sorta bonnyish, goodish, and gayish, but - hey - I'm, like, super-super-blithe. Does that work for you?